I started my own business in 2008 – it was a massive failure, yet I got hooked all the same. I fell in love with building something, earning money, meeting other business owners, learning, failing, succeeding and so on. Basically I enjoyed it. When I became I mum I knew that I didn’t want to work full-time, but I knew I wanted to do something. Something for me, something aside from being a mum.
So now I work part-time alongside my husband, I’m working on creating something for new mums, and I also write… therapeutic stuff like this.
I’ve found benefits of working, mainly for me but some benefits for my kids as well. Here they are, all 8 of them:
1. It gives me more energy. When I haven’t worked, by a Friday I’m craving a break, something that requires my brain to think creatively – and not just “what shall we make our den from?”
When I have worked during the week, I’m more grateful for the time I spend with my girls and I have tonnes more energy when I’m with them.
2. By working I am showing my girls that they too are capable of many things. They can be a decent mum and have outside interests. They can work and still be around for their children.
3. It’s a part of who I am, what I enjoy. I love working and if I deny that side of myself, will I be a better mum? Nope. Being true to who I am is important to me – and how I am as a mum.
4. It gives my husband the opportunity to spend time with the children by himself (without my all-knowing interference). This also helps him to understand why the house is nearly always a mess and why sometimes we have cheese and crackers for dinner.
5. I have something other than the children to talk about with the hubby. Not that children aren’t an interesting topic, I re-tell him every story, every amazing moment and every tricky one each evening, but I also get to share the other side of me, the working one.
6. I get to teach my kids that love isn’t always physically being there. They get to learn that I love them when I am in the house and when I am out of the house. They learn that they are important to me, but not all that I am.
7. I get to bring an extra income into the house. This means we get to buy the occasional t-shirt or a day trip to Puxton. It’s not much but in the wise words of Tesco: Every little helps.
8. When our children grow up and leave for school, university, work, marriage or a cult, I will still have skills that allow me to work.
Disclaimer: I have spent six months being a full time mummy and I’ve absolutely loved it. I do believe there are advantages of being a full-time mum for the children and for us parents. I don’t think either way is better or worse, I only speak of what is best for me (and I’m sure other working mums too).
I’m not a mum who is good at making things, I don’t have bags of physical energy. I am not the world’s best mum. I do my best (as do you) and for me that means being a mum who learns about parenting – and being loving. It means accepting my children always. And for me it means occasionally – and always – working.